PandaRoach

The evil present in Animal Documentaries:

Having just woken up from a 20min nap, I turned the TV on to keep me
some strange form of company.

I turned on the Discovery Channel and they were playing cute little
thing about pandas... showing cute yawning little things and other
"awwwwwwwww" inducing things.

Then it came.

Roaches. Roaches everywhere.
"The Male roach looks for females by stroaking other roaches'
antennas. When he finds one he lifts his wings and secretes a sweet
sticky substance. The female is drawn to the substance and eats it.
After eating it she becomes attatched to him and forced to carry him
around until they mate.
Female roaches only mate once, but carry the sperm around with them
and produce up to seven egg pods during their lives. The roaches are
apt to mate from the age of two months. If you have 10 roaches in your
house now, you can have over 1000 in six months time.
In each pod the female lays anywhere between 15 and 70 eggs, 20% of
these are then eaten by the adult roaches."

How can you not love these adorable vermin?
But...

"only 1% of roach species are actually considered a pest"

I was trapped by cute panda stories!!!! PANDAS!!!!
And then forced to listen to icky roaches. Well, I guess you've been
trapped too now. Sorry!